Does it really have to be for a lifetime?
We've been called to full-time ministry, probably for the rest of our lives. Morgan-a youth pastor. Me-a youth pastor's wife. Yesterday, my role's number one responsibility surfaced- to be his support and shoulder. Ministry hurts. 3 years in and ready to quit sometimes. Why? Because the view of the church has changed in our culture. Church people don't see their pastor as a shepherd; they see him as an employee. There's no trust; little respect for a minister's spiritual authority; and little care that he might be overworked from expectations. They think that because their money goes to provide for the pastor, they are the boss.
Ok, not always is this the situation, we all know. But 'tis the situation amongst several members of our church board right now. Board meetings result in drained, discouraged, and ready to quit pastors. Is this really how God intended it to work? No. Did God intend for this structure in teh first place? Have we made the "church" into a structure that inhibits true ministry, and instead promotes satisfaction of a believer's social "feed it to me now" organization?
It would be easy for me to pass this week's events off to my husband, saying, "don't worry honey, ministry's not usually like this." But the thing is, I am a pastor's daughter. I grew up in the church; I grew up witnessing first hand the burden and hurt that people in the church cast toward their shepherd. When is enough enough? How long can the church last like this? A shepherd cares for his sheep, and in return, they love him and are loyal, and provide for him.
Why are people mean? Especially, why are Christians mean?
Now, as a wife, my call is to pray for love. I pray that I might have love for my husband that would transfer to him as strength. I pray that I might have love for those who cause emotional harm, that bitterness would not grow in our home. I pray that I would have wisdom of words, to speak only that which is edifying. And I pray that God would expand the breadth of my shoulders to be extra wide for my husband during these times of ministry.
Thank you, God , for being an everpresent help and strength. Thank you for your love and eternal goodness. You make all of it worth it.
10 comments:
Man..I hear you. I'm a PK too and have moved out here to Vancouver where my family is and where my Dad is pastoring only to further witness those being sheperded act like Asses instead of sheep. It is hard to keep a right attitude. I'm so tired of hearing criticism, negative remarks and comments of despair. Is the church merely some event we attend..which we then leave and critique...and if the performer (pastor) doesn't do a good job we fire em? accckk.
Kudos to you for attempting to love despite...God Bless!
Hey Rach-
Vancouver, eh? You're not too far away! I feel for senior pastors now a days. The calling is getting harder and harder...people want to be spoon fed and powder-puff pleased. It's frustrating! Good old teens though. Ya know, you can always turn to them for a pat on the back. Give them an outlet for fun, honesty, and a place where atleast they can be real with God and each other, and they love you. Morgan and I were talking about this again tonight...
The only thing that is going to keep one going is knowing that the fruit of his labor is eternal. It's worth it to go through hard times, even though it sucks so bad, when you are able to see some results. Just seeing one person come to know Christ or grow makes it worth it.
The hard thing with adults is that they are often less open to receiving instruction than teens.
Thank God for youth ministry!
sounds rough.
i'm sending my love:
"@(#&$*>love<&@^%$#"
My brother (who is the youth/worship pastor) says he'd give up the music part of things if he had to choose. Trying to please a church musically is torture. BUT Youth Ministry is a rewarding and fun thing. They do recieve instruction and sometimes I think they crave it. I'm proud of you and Morgan. I even listened to one of MOrgan's sermons online one time..haha. Keep the faith and strength. I think its cool to hear the honesty about your situation. Thanks for sharing Angela.
I get frustrated when the church craps on the pastors too. I even left a church when I was a teenager over just that thing. I must admit though, I am thankful that this is not currently going on at our church right now.
Endurance (through the good and the bad) is something that definately the Lord has been teaching me through my internship... You can ask Him to move the mountain... but if He doesn't it mean He wants you to climb it... He will always be with you but get those hiking boots on! LOL.
I miss you two!
Kate
I too am learning more and more about what it truly means to be a pastor's wife. Often times the church expects more of the pastor and his wife than they do of themselves. As much as I love our church, there are times when I find the people of the world much more encouraging than the body of Christ. Sad isn't it?
"God...you make all of it worth it." A beautiful end to a painful but true post. People are unbearably mean sometimes. To love them is to be Christ to them. He said people would treat us like they treated Him. So unjust, but like you said, for Jesus, it's worth it. His love for us enables/compels us to love others. My prayers are with you today. May you both be filled with the love and peace and strength of our Great God.
A few hours later: praying for you guys and read this verse: "May the Lord of peace Himself always give you His peace no matter what happens. The Lord be with you all." (II Thess 3:16) :)
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